Contact With Police Officers While En Femme
“What to do when the unexpected happens while dressed en femme?” This is a question we CDs should consider more carefully than we do. It is particularly important to consider what our reaction will be if stopped by a police officer. That has happened to me three times while dressed. On a fourth occasion, I learned the do’s and don’ts from a police officer who was the guest speaker at a Sigma Mu Beta Chapter meeting several months ago.
One of the hot programs on cable television these days draws a lot of viewers by showing real life police situations. The focus of some of the shows is on the drivers of various vehicles fleeing law enforcement’s attempts to stop them, usually for stealing the vehicle they are in or for some traffic violation. One of those who fled police was a CD who had not come to a complete stop at a stop sign. Because he was dressed en femme when the blue light started flashing, he raced to get away. The fear of being discovered dressed in women's clothes was more than he could bare. Running through his mind must have been concerns about his family, friends, and neighbors finding out that he is a CD. There was little doubt that shooting though his mind was the "Oh, my" thought. "What will everyone think.” “I just can't let this happen."
Well, guess what. He got a great deal more than he ever imagined. At the top of the list was unwanted publicity on national television from a helicopter video and from ground videos in several police cars. When the chase finally ended, our panicked CD was forced to lay on the ground outside of his car with panty hose, high heals, and dress all in full view. There was no doubt that viewers were seeing a male dressed in female clothes. What this unprepared CD most feared landed squarely on him because he did not think about the consequences of not stopping when a policeman turns on the blue light. The ironclad rule he, and anyone else for that matter, should keep in mind as an unwavering commitment is to never, never, I do mean never, attempt to get away from a police officer for any reason.
Stopped While Out for a Walk
The first time I was stopped by a policeman, I was out for an early morning walk dressed. It was in the summer and the sun had just come up. This event occurred when my wife only suspected that I might be occasionally dressing en femme. To that point, she had seen a few indications of this behavior, but had not gotten confirmation. Because she is up so late at night, she sleeps well into the morning. While she slept this particular morning, I rose at 4 A.M., shaved, put on my makeup and dressed in pants and a top with matching flats for an early morning walk.
I was only a few blocks from home at 5 A.M. when I saw a policeman going the opposite direction on a main thoroughfare a block away. I continued to walk in the direction I was headed. I reflected that an encounter with a policeman was to be avoided because I am too well known around town to open myself to such an event. In retrospect, I could be said to be taking unnecessary risks, but then something in me compells me to be out and about as a woman.
To my great surprise, the policeman turned around out of view and pulled up beside me as I walked down the street. He lowered the window on the passenger side and said, "Mam." I was so stunned that I quickly turned around without answering and started walking briskly in the opposite direction. The policeman turned his cruiser around in a flash and was beside me again. I was afraid to run because I thought he would likely catch me and might soon call for assistance, so I stopped. He asked what I was doing. I told him in my male voice that I was taking a morning walk and that I liked walking at that time. I am not sure why I was afraid to speak in Annette’s voice, but I was. The policeman alternately called me Mam and Sir because I was dressed as a woman but sounded like a man. After several questions, including asking for identification and asking my name, he got a radio call. I told him did not have any identification on me, which was true, and that I would rather not tell him my name. I further declared that wasn’t doing anything wrong. Finally, he said he would let me go if I promised to go straight home. At that, I took off for home, but chose an indirect route. I am not sure what may have happened in the absence of the call the policemen got. That event was perhaps one of the scariest moments of my life. What humiliation would have come to me and my wife should I been arrested? That event put real fear into me.
Stopped While With Other CDs
My second encounter with a policeman was as a passenger in a king cab pickup truck. The driver had barely crossed a yellow line as she turned a corner in downtown Raleigh, NC. The three of us in the vehicle had just left a Tri-Ess chapter meeting and were on the way to a nightclub. Once the officer obtained the driver’s license and registration from the driver, she asked, "How do I know that this is you?" The driver answered in full male voice that we had just come from a transgendered support group meeting and were on our way to a nightclub. After checking the documentation, the officer let us go without issuing a citation. Forthrightness was obviously the correct action.
Stopped While In Route to a Restaurant
The third time a police officer stopped me I had just left the January 2007 Tri-Ess chapter meeting in Myrtle Beach, SC, at about 9 P.M. Several chapter members and I were on our way to a nearby restaurant. A police officer fell in behind me as I exited the parking lot where we hold our monthly meetings. The officer stayed right behind me for several blocks. Finally at a stoplight, he turned on his blue light. I pulled into the parking lot of a strip mall and waited for the officer to come to my vehicle.
I could not imagine why I was being stopped. I knew that I was not speeding and that I had come to a full and complete stop at every stop sign and stoplight. As expected, the officer asked for my driver’s license and registration. I was surprised when he told me that my license tag had expired. As it turned out, I was six days overdue in renewing my tags. I had not gotten a renewal notice forwarded to me from a part-year residence. The US Postal Service, per a DMV requirement, does not forward such documents. Oops!
Interestingly, the police officer did not comment on the fact that my driver’s license shows a male name and there I sat presenting as a female. After several minutes wait, another policeman arrived in his cruiser. The two officers chatted for a several minutes. (I’d like to have heard that conversation. Well, maybe not.) Then the second officer came to my vehicle to retrieve my registration, which I had not found before the first officer returned to his vehicle to validate my driver’s license. Obviously, a buddy came to see the crossdresser who he had stopped. The two of them probably had a big laugh about that later.
The officer advised me that if I renewed my tag before the court date three weeks hence, the $128 fine would be dropped. Of course, I promptly renewed the tags. Since I was stopped en femme, I want to see the Clerk of Court with the renewal documentation in hand dressed en femme. She photo copied my outdated and my renewed registration documents and marked my copy of the ticket “Dismissed.” As she handed the originals back to me, she said, “Here you are, Hon.” What a great day that turned out to be.
The Do’s and Don’ts
The Myrtle Beach police officer who spoke at our regular chapter meeting did his homework before coming. He said that officers in the Myrtle Beach police force get training in dealing with transgendered people, which is a fact members appreciated hearing.
On the male/female bathroom question, he said there is no law in the state of South Carolina that prohibits CDs or TSs from using the bathroom opposite their birth sex. He said CDs should always stop when a police officer signals for them to do so. The exception might be in an unsafe area. Then you should go to a place where others can see you being pulled over. (Some vehicles with blue lights are not police vehicles, but are used by predators instead.)
CDs should always provide a police officer proper documentation when asked. A card that indicates a CD is transgendered would be helpful. (Cards of this type are available from several sources. One through Tri-Ess National (a Virginia Chapter) and another for members of Sigma Mu Beta from the chapter VP.)
If a CD be arrested and taken to jail for any reason, the arresting officer should be asked to separate the CD from other incarcerated people. Personal safety is the important consideration here.
Love, Annette
One of the hot programs on cable television these days draws a lot of viewers by showing real life police situations. The focus of some of the shows is on the drivers of various vehicles fleeing law enforcement’s attempts to stop them, usually for stealing the vehicle they are in or for some traffic violation. One of those who fled police was a CD who had not come to a complete stop at a stop sign. Because he was dressed en femme when the blue light started flashing, he raced to get away. The fear of being discovered dressed in women's clothes was more than he could bare. Running through his mind must have been concerns about his family, friends, and neighbors finding out that he is a CD. There was little doubt that shooting though his mind was the "Oh, my" thought. "What will everyone think.” “I just can't let this happen."
Well, guess what. He got a great deal more than he ever imagined. At the top of the list was unwanted publicity on national television from a helicopter video and from ground videos in several police cars. When the chase finally ended, our panicked CD was forced to lay on the ground outside of his car with panty hose, high heals, and dress all in full view. There was no doubt that viewers were seeing a male dressed in female clothes. What this unprepared CD most feared landed squarely on him because he did not think about the consequences of not stopping when a policeman turns on the blue light. The ironclad rule he, and anyone else for that matter, should keep in mind as an unwavering commitment is to never, never, I do mean never, attempt to get away from a police officer for any reason.
Stopped While Out for a Walk
The first time I was stopped by a policeman, I was out for an early morning walk dressed. It was in the summer and the sun had just come up. This event occurred when my wife only suspected that I might be occasionally dressing en femme. To that point, she had seen a few indications of this behavior, but had not gotten confirmation. Because she is up so late at night, she sleeps well into the morning. While she slept this particular morning, I rose at 4 A.M., shaved, put on my makeup and dressed in pants and a top with matching flats for an early morning walk.
I was only a few blocks from home at 5 A.M. when I saw a policeman going the opposite direction on a main thoroughfare a block away. I continued to walk in the direction I was headed. I reflected that an encounter with a policeman was to be avoided because I am too well known around town to open myself to such an event. In retrospect, I could be said to be taking unnecessary risks, but then something in me compells me to be out and about as a woman.
To my great surprise, the policeman turned around out of view and pulled up beside me as I walked down the street. He lowered the window on the passenger side and said, "Mam." I was so stunned that I quickly turned around without answering and started walking briskly in the opposite direction. The policeman turned his cruiser around in a flash and was beside me again. I was afraid to run because I thought he would likely catch me and might soon call for assistance, so I stopped. He asked what I was doing. I told him in my male voice that I was taking a morning walk and that I liked walking at that time. I am not sure why I was afraid to speak in Annette’s voice, but I was. The policeman alternately called me Mam and Sir because I was dressed as a woman but sounded like a man. After several questions, including asking for identification and asking my name, he got a radio call. I told him did not have any identification on me, which was true, and that I would rather not tell him my name. I further declared that wasn’t doing anything wrong. Finally, he said he would let me go if I promised to go straight home. At that, I took off for home, but chose an indirect route. I am not sure what may have happened in the absence of the call the policemen got. That event was perhaps one of the scariest moments of my life. What humiliation would have come to me and my wife should I been arrested? That event put real fear into me.
Stopped While With Other CDs
My second encounter with a policeman was as a passenger in a king cab pickup truck. The driver had barely crossed a yellow line as she turned a corner in downtown Raleigh, NC. The three of us in the vehicle had just left a Tri-Ess chapter meeting and were on the way to a nightclub. Once the officer obtained the driver’s license and registration from the driver, she asked, "How do I know that this is you?" The driver answered in full male voice that we had just come from a transgendered support group meeting and were on our way to a nightclub. After checking the documentation, the officer let us go without issuing a citation. Forthrightness was obviously the correct action.
Stopped While In Route to a Restaurant
The third time a police officer stopped me I had just left the January 2007 Tri-Ess chapter meeting in Myrtle Beach, SC, at about 9 P.M. Several chapter members and I were on our way to a nearby restaurant. A police officer fell in behind me as I exited the parking lot where we hold our monthly meetings. The officer stayed right behind me for several blocks. Finally at a stoplight, he turned on his blue light. I pulled into the parking lot of a strip mall and waited for the officer to come to my vehicle.
I could not imagine why I was being stopped. I knew that I was not speeding and that I had come to a full and complete stop at every stop sign and stoplight. As expected, the officer asked for my driver’s license and registration. I was surprised when he told me that my license tag had expired. As it turned out, I was six days overdue in renewing my tags. I had not gotten a renewal notice forwarded to me from a part-year residence. The US Postal Service, per a DMV requirement, does not forward such documents. Oops!
Interestingly, the police officer did not comment on the fact that my driver’s license shows a male name and there I sat presenting as a female. After several minutes wait, another policeman arrived in his cruiser. The two officers chatted for a several minutes. (I’d like to have heard that conversation. Well, maybe not.) Then the second officer came to my vehicle to retrieve my registration, which I had not found before the first officer returned to his vehicle to validate my driver’s license. Obviously, a buddy came to see the crossdresser who he had stopped. The two of them probably had a big laugh about that later.
The officer advised me that if I renewed my tag before the court date three weeks hence, the $128 fine would be dropped. Of course, I promptly renewed the tags. Since I was stopped en femme, I want to see the Clerk of Court with the renewal documentation in hand dressed en femme. She photo copied my outdated and my renewed registration documents and marked my copy of the ticket “Dismissed.” As she handed the originals back to me, she said, “Here you are, Hon.” What a great day that turned out to be.
The Do’s and Don’ts
The Myrtle Beach police officer who spoke at our regular chapter meeting did his homework before coming. He said that officers in the Myrtle Beach police force get training in dealing with transgendered people, which is a fact members appreciated hearing.
On the male/female bathroom question, he said there is no law in the state of South Carolina that prohibits CDs or TSs from using the bathroom opposite their birth sex. He said CDs should always stop when a police officer signals for them to do so. The exception might be in an unsafe area. Then you should go to a place where others can see you being pulled over. (Some vehicles with blue lights are not police vehicles, but are used by predators instead.)
CDs should always provide a police officer proper documentation when asked. A card that indicates a CD is transgendered would be helpful. (Cards of this type are available from several sources. One through Tri-Ess National (a Virginia Chapter) and another for members of Sigma Mu Beta from the chapter VP.)
If a CD be arrested and taken to jail for any reason, the arresting officer should be asked to separate the CD from other incarcerated people. Personal safety is the important consideration here.
Love, Annette
posted by Annette @ 1/27/2007 08:10:00 PM
2 Comments:
At 10:01 PM,
Alex said…
I was caught by the police while dressed as a woman too. It was highly embarrassing, I felt like I was going to pass out or vomit. I had to explain why I had a bag full of women's clothes in my car. He thought I might be a drug dealer, and so searched my car for drugs/syringes. Then he recommended that I ring a crisis line and 'get rid of it' (he thought that crossdressing is something that can be cured).
At 4:57 PM,
Annette said…
It will take many years before society in general comes to accept CDs and transgendered people. Harassment that comes from unexpected places can be unsettling.
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